I wrote a blog post a few years ago about sensing when life is about to shift. I am feeling it again.

There’s a pull in my soul to pack up the house and buy a van. I’m a writer now, so I tell myself. But actually…it is true. I’m about to release my second novel and currently working on the third. I launched a Substack. I even added “author” to my Instagram bio. (That alone solidifies a career change.)

And what better way to live a writer’s life than to hit the road with a notebook, a camera, and a dream?

But here’s the truth though: no one is really reading what I write.

At least, not yet. (Insert optimism here!)

Some days, writing a blog post feels less like broadcasting and more like whispering into a canyon hoping the echo reached someone that needed to hear it. And when I look at my subscriber count, I start to wonder if I built a stage no one asked for. Not enough people know who I am to support my van life endeavors. Not to mention, the dog is not going to go for van life. He hates riding in the car.

They said, build it and they will come. I’m still feeling like a party of one. Just me and the DJ. The music is good, but no one else has arrived. Not yet.

I know part of it is me.

Promoting means stepping out. Being seen. And if I’m honest, that still terrifies me.

Somewhere deep down, I still carry the echoes of voices that told me I wasn’t enough. And over time, I started to believe them.

But here’s the thing about shifts, they don’t wait for permission. They come whether you are ready or not.

I’m done hiding. I’m choosing ease this time, and not because it’s easy. It’s just that fighting the shift is harder.

I have recorded a few Instagram videos. I started sharing more about my genre. My cover designer created a sneak peek I actually love. I even took a few photos of myself (and survived the stomach flips that came with posting them).

It’s a start.

Shakey, but a start all the same.

If you’ve ever felt like the square peg, the only one dancing at your own party, I see you.
I am you.

And I’m not giving up.

Because even if the party hasn’t filled up yet, I’m still here. The music’s still playing. And the shift is already in motion.

You coming?

Love and light my friends!

Portia Leivette